Just some crap

The sky always seemed so unreachable. Till she came along. She made it so that I could reach up and touch the clouds. Fly with the birds. Nap with the moon. There was nothing that was untouchable. Undoable. But there are still days. Days where it doesn't feel like anything is possible. Like there is nothing I can do. Where I don't want to get up and see the world. Like there is nothing worth seeing. Even with her gentle touch and beautiful smile. Even with the idea that the world can be beautiful. Sometimes the monsters just seem to real. But I have to keep going. Pull myself away from the sanctuary of the blankets and comforting warmth and stand tall. I take their bites and their hate and their words. I take the scratches and their beatings. And I come back to her. Beaten and bruised. Back to the warmth and safety of the blankets. But sometimes it's like there isn't any warmth to be had. The place that once held comfort only brings fire. It agitates the scratches and bites. It's times like that where there is no where to go but outside. Into the isolation of the snow and the dark and the quiet. Back into a world that doesn't seem to want me there. But I stand strong. And in that silence, sometimes the thought comes. That maybe shadows aren't meant to be happy after all.